How to help your child grow into a natural leader

Most people would agree that leadership is a valuable quality for any worker to have. Even if they don’t end up being a CEO, or head of department at a multinational corporation, opportunities to take ownership of projects and to set the direction of tasks are everywhere and show a worker as a vital asset to any team.

However, many people still believe the myth that enterprise skills such as leadership, problem solving, collaboration and communication can’t be taught or developed. Great leaders are made, not born – and we want to show some ways that young people can develop their leadership skills to improve their prospects.

1. Show that leading is more about supporting others than being a superstar contributor.

If you’ve ever worked under a great team leader, you know that they devote a great deal of their time to bringing the best out of you, rather than trying to carry the team themselves. In fact, there are many downsides to believing that one exceptional individual can carry a team, rather than cultivating a team that can support themselves.

Leaders who take on too much are likely to burn out, grow resentful of their reports, fail to appropriately develop their reports, or miss out on the diversity of opinion that breeds innovation and creativity. On the other hand, appropriately delegating work allows reports to build their skills and confidence, creating a culture of participation and collaboration that can pay dividends down the track.

When it comes to instilling these values in a young person, it’s about stressing the importance of honesty, sharing and delegation, which are related to trust. One way to do this is to lead by example by asking them for help when working on particular tasks or projects. Teendom very much concerns the transition from seeing parents as omnipotent beings to people just like them. By bringing them into the fold, you are simultaneously empowering them to learn to work together, and signaling your trust in them to have a go at more adult responsibilities and ideas.

2. By being open to other perspectives and alternative sources of information.

Similarly, many people see a strong leader as one with a my-way-or-the-highway mentality, but great leaders are effective problem-solvers, and a key part of problem-solving is gathering information. One of the best ways to gather information is by actively listening. By listening to customers, managers, coworkers, and even people outside the team, leaders can gain valuable insights and identify connections between different problems and potential solutions. For example, a leader might connect a customer's problem with a side project that a coworker is working on, or suggest a team member talk to someone who can help them solve a specific issue.

For teenagers, one of the most powerful tools is leading by example. Showing them the importance of active listening skills such as eye contact, body language, paraphrasing, and asking open-ended questions both helps you cultivate more meaningful connections with your children while also helping them to understand what being a good listener looks like.

If you’re looking to more specifically target behaviors, especially in younger children, a great way to start is to ask them to paraphrase what you’ve asked them to do or talked about in their own words, or enforce rules such as limiting or eliminating screen time during family mealtimes.

3. Help them to build resilience

In the tech world and beyond, workplaces are becoming more innovation oriented, which means that the old value of ‘always being right’ is considered a weakness rather than a strength. The innovators of today are expected to fail quickly and fail often to find the correct solution more quickly – and at the heart of this process is a sense of resilience.

Everyone experiences setbacks and failures, but resilience is more than just coping. By cultivating a sense of inherent self-worth, young people can feel encouraged to seek new ways to move through problems and find new solutions. Merely going through hardships doesn’t automatically build resilience; to do that, you need to cultivate self-respect and self-compassion. Self-respect is about creating standards for how they treat others, and how they expect others to treat them. This also helps them cultivate their values and moral judgement, and develop the courage to stand up for themselves and others.

The other aspect is the ability to practice self-compassion, which means being kind to oneself when things don’t happen the way they expect. Setbacks are a natural part of life, but the ability to move through self-pity or unconstructive self-criticism and create a plan for next time will help their careers by encouraging initiative and developing courage to take on leadership opportunities.

In conclusion, leadership is a multifaceted skill that can be cultivated and honed. By understanding the core principles of effective leadership—empathy, delegation, active listening, and resilience—young people can position themselves for success. By leading by example, encouraging critical thinking, and fostering a growth mindset, parents and mentors can empower the next generation of leaders. Remember, leadership is not about dominance but about service. It's about inspiring others, fostering collaboration, and driving positive change. By embracing these qualities, young people can unlock their full potential and make a meaningful impact on the world.